Saturday, 6 March 2010

In shock

It's not like I didn't know that this day would come. It's not like I hadn't thought about it. And, really, I have no right to be mad. I was the one who broke it off, the one who had moved on. I should want you to move on too right?

And I do, don't get me wrong. I do. I want you to be happy because I still care about you. How could I not? I can't just forget two whole years that easily. It's not like I want to either. I still want you in my life.

When you told me you would wait for me I was scared. Scared that you wouldn't be able to move on. But now I'm just furious at you for making this so akward for me.

You were always an exception. Always the good guy. The guy who wanted something more. You made me feel special. You had chosen me out of all the other girls.

And suddenly you decide to look at a random girl whom you don't know or care about and it's just that simple for you. That easy. She's not special...Therefore why should I think that I am?

I know we used to talk about how much time was enough to start looking forward, start looking for someone else. And I know I said a month would be enough. But what did you expect? I knew it would not be enough but, how could I tell you?

And then you go and find a girl to hook up with the day we did one month apart. Real classy.

I know you didn't want to hurt me and I don't feel this way because I want you back. No, that is not it. I am just so confused. You've still hurt me a lot, even though you swear you are the one hurting because of the break up.

Excuse me for not understanding how, if that's true, you could go off with another girl that easily.

I suppose that you've wounded my ego real badly. I know it may not be fair, but you should have thought about me. I have done nothing but think about ways not to hurt you this past month, but don't worry, that is going to stop.

It may not be fair, but you already knew that.


  1. This is some excellent writing :)

  2. Lo siento Laura :(