Monday, 16 November 2009

Butter Fingers

Do you ever have the feeling that things are slipping through your fingers? And you try desperately to hold on, but it just seems impossible.

If I want to get together with my friends (school and outside) together, it's always me who has to organize it. It's not like I'm a great organizer. Heck, I'm a lousy organizer! I get stressed, anxious, nervous...

I am not good at it. 

The sad part is it's always me who has to organize it because, if not, no one bothers. They all say: 'You do it, you are better than me at that.' But how could that be true if they haven't even tried?

The thing is, I want to tell them I won't do it again, that I am tired of it, that it looks as if I'm the only one that cares for our friendship.

But I can't. I can't because I'm scared that they won't do anything. That they'll slip through my fingers, that what I've worked for all this time will just break so easily. That I'll get to see that I was really the only one who cared.



  1. I know EXACTLY how you feel, my group of friends always turn to me when we're deciding what to do, or they ask me what we're doing that day, I feel like running away with my hands clamped over my ears singing lalalala sort it out yourselves! I guess we should take it as a compliment, or on the sad side take it that they don't really care much, but I guess some people are leaders and some are followers. Maybe they like your ideas and thats why they always ask you?
    Also thank you very much for the award (if I haven't said it before)

  2. Ahhh I completely understand too. The organising of things always falls in the hands of my best friend and I. It gets quite annoying. I really love your blog so far. My sister showed it to me because I always say "heck", and you said "heck" in that post. And THEN you were talking about being the one others rely on to organise things, and me and my best friend were having just that conversation earlier today. And THEN I saw that your blog is called just listen, and the main character in the book that my blog is named after is called "Listen". Anyway, lots of coincidences, which probably aren't even actually coincidences to anyone other than me...

  3. i know exactly how you feel. some years ago, i was in the same place. my friends just never bothered to organize something and if i hadn't, we would just simply have ended up doing nothing. then, i somehow had a friend who asked me so often if i had time. at that point i noticed that it doesn't have to be the way it used to be. what i want to say - you shouldn't only run after your friends. they should come to you too. if they don't... maybe it's time.
    i love that sentence, "Do you ever have the feeling that things are slipping through your fingers? And you try desperately to hold on, but it just seems impossible."